My first pet to my knowledge was a fish. As except me and my
bother no one else at my home is so much interested in pet, so we bro n sis duo
lost our fight for a dog. But finally with lots of arguments, hunger strikes and
walkouts, we were allowed to have a pet with a strange condition. And the
condition was the pet is not allowed to mooch around the whole house.
‘WHAT!’- This was my
first response with disgust and also of my dumb brother. I tried to argue more,
but it didn’t work. What is it? It means having a pet that won’t move at all? Are
you guys’ nuts? How is it possible? I was too upset that’s when my witty mind
finally worked. I got a pet. And that’s my fish.
You may be thinking I
could have a bird in a nest but certainly and frankly speaking I don’t like to
snitch someone’s free breath and shackle them for my amusement. Especially birds
and I don’t the reason for my guilt feeling. Just it is not justified. They are
also living being. How would we feel if someone had tied us like that to a pole
every time and always make us follow their order. Our lives would become hell
and we would be begging for death. So I’m strictly against all these. Finally, I was left with this option only.
The very day I decided to do it. I brightly remember, It was 30th
December, 2010 night when I brought it home. I brought a baby tiny shiny gold
fish with a pot. Right from then it became my roommate, the only listener and
audience of demented ranting about others and all other crazy activities. I
could have bought a big aquarium also. But I know myself and also know that
what kind of a lazy buster I’m. So I preferred to bring a small pot of 20’’
radius containing about 20 liter water which was comfy dwelling of my baby
fish.
I remember the moment when that lanky dark man handed me it in
a thick polythene bag tightly knotted at the top. It was really cute whirling
inside pouting out tiny bubbles and I was head over heel. Its best features
were big long layered sparkling wings on its tail and galls. They were creating
fine spectrum in the water under fluorescent light. The moment I saw the fish
in pet shop, I was totally fetched to it. Somewhere it felt different from
others. I brought it home with care more than the personnel might have put in
carrying Kohinoor diamond.
I won’t say that it became attached to me in a minute and
started playing with me. It took time to accommodate itself into its new glassy
world and the environment of my cluttered room. I used to behold at it for
hours. Sometimes I find it sad and filled with some loneliness, the same
emptiness I do find in my heart. May be on later moments we became good friends
though we are totally different creatures.
There were certain things that I noticed about it. The first
thing, my fish was a big foodie like me. Instead of twice in a day I used to
feed it for four times a day and that also twice of it’s recommended food
amount. In music it loved soft rock (especially of linkin park and Enrique) and
‘eyes on fire’ of Twilight movie. We both used to dance together, both in
different form that don’t match with any other existing form in the world.
Whenever I was going out for classes, work or hanging out, before
stepping out I used to kiss the it at the glass of pot. And when I was flicking on the light after a
long time leaving it in dim lights, it used to stick to glass of pot, stare at
me for while and then resume. I still can feel those deep dotted eyes looking
at me.
But one day it also left me and it was my entire fault. It’s 9th
February, a black day for me. The night before I fought at home over some silly
matter, slept weeping and tensed. But among all these I forgot to feed it at
night. When in morning I went to feed it, it was lying cold at the bottom of
pot. I lost my senses for a while. Tears ran down cheeks. How cruel, careless
and irresponsible I’m. I lost such a friend for my small forgetfulness. With a
stone at heart, I buried its mortal body on the backyard, laid a stone on it
and put some yellow marigold flowers that exactly matched its color.
I know it’s gone, no more here around me to swirl- to play- to
listen me for long hours- to share my loneliness but it’s in my heart n it will
remain always. You will always stay in heart, baby and I can’t ever forget
you and our friendship. I wish you will forgive though I still feel guilty at
my heart for such a fiendish heart. Just pray to the Almighty that your soul
may rest in peace.
.